Meaning of Love

Many people that I have run across associate love with a emotion.

When I ask them, how do they "love a person" I haven't received a reply outside of a monatary gift.In addition, when I ask how do they "want to be loved", I rarely get a answer (It is generally a gift of significant monetary value). The more the cost - the greater the love. Do you see what I am getting at ?

It is difficult to "show love" or emotion that are associated with love. Further there is a limited amount of $$$$ available.

 Yes emotions can "be shared" but they are often fleeting and influenced by bills, children, politics, stock market, and busy schedules. In addition, most emotions fade over time. We remember people we love, trust, been hurt by but the emotions are mere shadows.

Consider trust. It is a action that is associated with a very strong emotion ( a child trust their parent).

May I suggest that love is a action ?

That is why a person feels a emotion, it is by the other persons behavior toward us or a loved one. Btw, CS Lewis wrote a book called The Four Loves of which is a great way to identify different loves (Charity, Brotherly, Erotic, Affection).Here is a run down of what is read at most weddings from 1 Cor 13 on Love:

-patient

-kind

-not envious

-not boastful

-not arrogant  

-not rude

-not insistent on its own way

-not irritable

-not resentful  

-“does not rejoice” at wrongdoing

-“rejoices” with the truth 

-bears all

-believes all

-hopes all

-endures allLove is demonstrative in actions.

Consider a patient parent withe a unruly child,  a wife who believes in her husband after loosing his job.

Hoping and wanting the the best for others despite their many short comings and the same in return.

When I look at this, I am quite humbled. When I have said, "I love you" in word, I have not in action.

It has also forced me to review my intimacy language in relationships. I have come up with stronger and deeper expressions than "I love you".

It is quite possible to love someone (by your action) and have a strong negative emotion toward them.Does that make sense ?

Allow me to use the example of your spouse does something unintentional to hurt you - you still love/act kind toward your spouse but are hurt/anger with them.Get it ? 

To date, I haven't used my new love vocabulary with anyone. These special words/love language "in reserve" (these are from my the depths of my soul - deep calling to deep and carry great mass). I speculate it will be years before I use them. Not because I am that picky or my criteria is lofty ( I am accused of such), but simply because close relationships are like masterpieces. Each one takes time and is truly unique. 

So like great wine held in a reserve, they will get better with age and hopefully I will find more to add to my collection (To date, I have 3 "bottles").

May this serve a gentle reminder to really consider how we act/love toward others. I sincerly believe it will turn one into a saint or into a psychopath. It will take one to peace or into bondage (one could infinitely expound on this- I hope you see it).

Btw, this is from the Old & New testament in the Bible.

Love God first and your neighbor as yourself.